Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

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I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What is your favorite cuckold experience?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Why do gun owners feel the need to defend themselves with deadly weapons? Can they not just talk things out like civilized people do?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for fakery

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I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have a reading level above third grade

What is something you have to share?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Recently, I cleared my JP Morgan coding round. Next, I received mail for a video interview. What kind of questions are asked in this round? How do I prepare myself?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t buy bullshit

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

What can help me fall asleep at night?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Why does my private parts itch so much during certain periods?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand how hurricane paths work

Can trans people tell me what the criteria for a woman is excluding self identification (facts do not rely on self belief)?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

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It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

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I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I can count

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Gen X, millennials are about three times more likely than their parents to be diagnosed with appendix cancer, study finds - CNN

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why don't I get sleep at nights?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Have you ever lied to your family? What were the circumstances?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I see through liars

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I actually pay taxes

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I can read

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light